Fifteen things Print E-mail
News - Final Word
Monday, 25 September 2017 21:26
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In celebration of the Bronnie’s 15th birthday I started making a list of 15 things I’ve learned over 15 years. Sort of like candles on a birthday cake. But, the list ended up much longer than 15 things and way too woo-woo to wave as a flag of wellness. I offer you my whittled-down version:

  1. I’ve learned that whatever it is you place your focus on, becomes your reality. Mike Dooley says it better: “Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones.”
  2. I’ve learned how to step out of a downward spiral. Okay, well, if I catch myself early enough. It is what Abraham Hicks calls ‘relief’. When in a bad way, ask yourself: Do I want to feel like this? No? Then what other thought could bring me a bit of relief? Keep reaching towards the next better-feeling thought. Nothing is more important than that I feel good.
  3. I’ve learned that whatever it is I think I want, what I actually want is the emotion I think I’ll feel when I get the wanted thing. Christy Whitman says you should feel the emotion first. What can you do right now that will evoke that emotion? Emotion is the quickest way to align yourself with what you want.
  4. I’ve learned that nobody comes into my life by mere coincidence. Timothy Leary says that everyone carries a piece of the puzzle. Who knows what you might learn from taking a chance on conversation with a stranger?
  5. I’ve learned the horror of half-heartedness: Yoda from ‘Star Wars’ says: “Try not. Do or do not do. There is no try.”
  6. I’ve learned to change my perspective about things I don’t want. They help me to get clear on what I do want. Christy Whitman calls it contrast.
  7. I’ve learned that acceptance is not approval. Eckhart Tolle writes that the pain that you create now is always some form of unconscious resistance to the present moment. Full acceptance is nothing more than full attention.
  8. I’ve learned to have one rule only in life. It takes the form of a question I ask myself before deciding anything: Will this be an expression of who I am?
  9. I’ve learned to listen to the song in my head. No such thing as a weird coincidence, said Carl Gustav Jung, who coined the term ‘synchronicity’. Hence I go Google the lyrics to the song in my head. The words are usually precisely what I need to hear.
  10. I’ve learned the truth of what Ralph Waldo Emerson said: “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
  11. I’ve learned that playfulness is vastly underestimated. Mike Dooley’s Frank says that when we are playful, we stop trying to control and simply allow an energetic flow of joyful expression.
  12. I’ve learned that it’s your beliefs – and the behaviour that stems from those beliefs – that largely determine your experience of moving through time. Christiane Northrup says that you can’t change a belief that is unconscious. But once it’s conscious, then you are in the driver’s seat of your own life.
  13. I’ve learned that the worst reason to do things would be for external validation. If you wait for approval until you claim who you are, you’re trying to pull the horse with the cart, says Teri Uktena.
  14. I’ve learned that taking action on anything is a lot like sailing. Mike Dooley says you pick your destination, hoist up your sail and let the wind do all the hard work. You don’t hoist your sails to move the boat, but to put yourself within reach of the wind.
  15. I’ve learned that unless you face your own shadows, you will continue seeing them in others. Carl Gustav Jung said that the world outside you is only a reflection of the world inside you.

So, if these are the 15 candles on my Bronnie-birthday cake, we should blow them out now. Close your eyes and make a wish, girlfriend. Then surrender your expectations. This is so that you can recognise your present when it arrives in gift-wrap other than that which you were looking out for.

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