And here we are in the year 2025! There was a time when reaching the millennium sounded unattainable, never mind a quarter of a century beyond it. The idea felt like science fiction, almost like time travelling. Thing is, we all spend each day travelling back and forth through time, whether we’re aware of it or not.

So it says in a ‘BrainWorld Magazine’ article, ‘How our brains define our sense of self’. The article says that our journey through time goes beyond the physical realm. Although we take a step forward each day, embarking on a new journey as we experience new things, it is travelling to the past that defines us.

“You might say that we’re constantly in the process of reinventing ourselves – a process we carry out every day with just a mental construct of who we are as a blueprint for putting each piece together. The glue to hold all of what constitutes our identity together is our memory.”

According to the article we shuffle through our memories and use them to imagine and create the future. Obviously then the bad memories – bad glue, if you’d like – severely impacts the way we’ll hold together our present sense of self.

Much of the ‘bad glue’ comes from childhood, sometimes even from preverbal stages. Psychologist Carl Gustav Jung introduced the concept of an inner child that can drive many of our daily emotions as adults, particularly when we’re unaware of it.

Reparenting your inner child means to give (and allow yourself to receive) the nurturing, love and validation that you may not have received in the way that you needed to receive it. This concept became known to a broader audience through John Bradshaw’s books and TV shows.

Kim Murray, an expert in inner child work, uses tapping (emotional freedom technique), visualization and meditation to help people connect with, nurture and heal their inner child. Jessica Ortner from The Tapping Solution recently spoke to Kim and wrote an article, ‘Four things your inner child needs to hear’, based on their conversation. This is what she says:

1. All of your emotions are valid: The little child you used to be probably experienced emotions that she felt she had to suppress, ignore or hide from the people around her. She may have learned that she shouldn’t feel a certain way or that her emotions didn’t make sense. The truth is that all of her emotions were valid. She had a right to feel them and had the right for those feelings to be seen, honoured, and validated. 
2. You are enough: Our strongest limiting beliefs are formed when our nervous systems are still learning to adapt to the world. Unfortunately we carry these beliefs into our adult lives and they impact how we see ourselves and the world around us. One of the strongest limiting beliefs is the feeling that we’re not enough. Tell your inner child that she has always been enough and always will be.
3. I won’t abandon you, no matter what: As an adult you can help yourself to feel calmer by soothing the inner child who is scared, vulnerable and worried that she’ll be abandoned. Let that inner child know that you’ll be there for her, protect her, care for her and that you’ll have her back no matter what she does and no matter what mistakes she makes.
4. You are safe now – free to be yourself: If you can allow your inner child to feel secure, you can start releasing old patterns, dismantle limiting beliefs and let go of self-doubt. You can reach a place in the present moment where you become connected, aligned and start living as your most authentic self.

Want to give it a try, girlfriend? Kim says you do it like this: Kneel next to the little girl you used to be, look into her eyes and tell her: All of your emotions are valid. Your feelings make sense. You are enough. You’ve always been enough. You will always be enough.

I’m always here for you. I’ll never abandon you. No matter what, I’ve got your back. You are safe now. I’m here to handle whatever comes our way. You can relax and just be yourself.

May the knowingness that you are enough and that you can safely express your true self accompany you each step of the way in 2025. – Angie Kleijn